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"About six or seven weeks," I try moving away from her knowing she has no intention of helping me. “Haven’t you jacked off?” as I feel Katie kissing my back as her hand again wraps itself around my raging hard on. “No, I thought you would eventually give in and I actually wasn't in the mood as I focused on getting you to forgive me.” "Oh! I bet your balls are starting to ache with all of that sweet cum in them,” I feel her hand manipulating my testicles. She pulls her hand away as she leans on my chest, “Do you know what I dreamed about?” “Teasing me until I exploded?” Katie giggled as she leaned closer to me, “I was sucking your cock and you pulled out of my mouth and you shot your cum all over me.” “Maybe you should act on your dreams?” “I've been so horny lately. I woke up and my pussy was so wet. The thought of your cum dripping all over me.” Katie removes her hand as I turn to face her. She smiles sticks her tongue out and laps her hand. She makes sure to show me she's. But in some way it seems that I have passed some border which is not acceptable. Even others involved in this lifestyle have tried to explain to me that what I am longing for can be all right as fantasies but warns me not to go too far. At the same time, pain is for me a source of ecstatic pleasure that I could not get in any other way. Surely there are many nutcases around in the world and I am sure that you are only wishing me well by trying to warn me against living out my fantasies. But once you have finally found Him, where everything falls into place... when I have found Him who can play my body with His sensitive fingers like a musician plays his instrument... why would I ever want to go back? My one and only desire is to advance further into this wonderful world of pain and submission in order to experience new sensations.A psychologist would probably explain my desires by some traumatic experiences in my childhood. I can honestly say that my childhood was one of happiness.
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